Archive for October, 2011
Teens and the Internet
93% of children ages 12 through 18 access the Internet. We all know that the Internet is a very useful tool for information gathering, for social networking, and entertainment. The real challenge confronting parents of teens is the ability to exert control over a world that, by its very nature, thrives on breaking down boundaries and on anonymity. Furthermore, given that teens are, by their developmental stage, impulsive and risk takers, the prospect of problematic behaviors is very high. Horror stories abound of net bullying, sexual abuse, porn and online gaming addiction. “Friending” no longer requires face to face communication. “Sexting” is new to our vocabulary.
The two overarching principles in considering healthy Internet use are:
1) Use of the Internet is a privilege and
2) Clear communication.
Healthy Internet use: Like the issues of safe sex and use of drugs and alcohol, parents need to have very clear communication regarding their expectations. Co-creating a healthy Internet use contract can be very useful. Just as each family needs basic household rules (respect, homework, chores, and curfew), computer and Internet use require a whole subset of rules. Any discussion of rules needs to take into account the age and maturity level of the child and should cover the following areas:
1. Healthy Internet use
2. When and where the Internet can be accessed
3. Family privacy/sharing of personal information online
4. Sharing user names and passwords (Parents must have access to all user names and passwords).
5. Friending/meeting others online and offline (a common rule is no online “friending” without prior face to face meeting).
6. Respectful communication. Online behavior, because of anonymity and lack of rules, is rife with disrespect.
7. Blocking and monitoring: Teens need to know that you are watching. Naturally, or older and more mature teens, oversight might be reduced. Software recommended for blocking is Net Nanny, for oversight, SuperWinSpy.
8. Unacceptable online behaviors: While these may seem to be obvious, a good discussion with your teen can be eye opening.
9. Consequences: This is a most critical component of any contract. Very important is the notion of tailoring the consequence to the violation and not going overboard on minimal violations.
The contract should be signed by all family members and posted in a conspicuous location (refrigerator door perhaps). Any discussion of rules must also include legal issues. Clearly “sexting”, “bullying”, and downloading of illegal material are important topics.
While the above discussion is designed for kids, parents need to be reminded that they are setting the example of technology use. The other day I observed a father tossing a football with his teenage son. The play kept being interrupted by dad’s cell phone calls. His son complained, “Dad, you’re always on your cell. Can’t you just turn it off and spend some time with me?” The dad told his son that he had important business to take care of. How do you think that teen felt about the use/abuse of technology?
Obviously the old saw, “It’s not what you say, it’s what you do” is in play here. Parents set the table for their children’s future by their own example of technology use.
Religion and the Internet
Posted by este in Broadband Internet, Communications on October 1, 2011
When you think about the things in our lives that the internet has touched there are many things that come to mind. For example, you may think of how we bank, shop, get music or even pay our bills. But one aspect of our lives that the internet has influenced and is not quite as obvious is religion. However, the expansion of broadband internet services has had a profound impact on religion and how it is viewed.
For one, religion is now more accessible than ever thanks to high speed broadband expansion. For example, Muslims around the world can hear the daily call to prayer by simply downloading the prayer schedule onto their phone, tablet or computer. Christians can also log on to hear daily prayers which are posted by some churches. They can also watch a church service from the comfort of their home thanks to streaming video. In addition, Bible passages are just a mouse click away and you don’t even have to know exactly where the verse is located. Jews are also able to learn Hebrew in 140 character lessons thanks to schools which tweet lessons each day.
Those who are homebound are also able to participate in church services. They can simply log in and see what their fellow church members are up to, get a look at the minutes of meetings and watch services on Sunday. Those who are interested in seeing what different denominations are about can also do easy research thanks to the internet. They can see how each church worships and then make an informed decision on what church they would like to visit.
There is no longer a worry about distance as well. Even those who are not religious can find like minded individuals in blogs and chat rooms in order to share their opinions. In addition, there are millions of Muslims living all over the world and now they can remain tied to their home country and culture thanks to the internet. Others can also watch services from their home church when away on vacation or business.
Even the reputations that certain religions may have are beginning to shift. Churches are embracing the digital wave and tweeting their messages as well as setting up Facebook accounts. They are also using video technology to stream church services as well as weekly messages from priests and pastors. This has caused some who used to view the church as stodgy to change their mind as churches are using technology.
More and more people are now getting involved in their church thanks to social media sites. This is because members are able to leave feedback and get involved in the church easier. As a result, those associated with the church are able to make changes based on what the congregation wants.